Is God Stupid?

As we all know, Jerry "Jihad" Falwell keeled over last week from a fatal heart attack, (which any day now will also visit Dick "The Hut" Cheney).

My psychic friends advise me that the reverend has adjusted well to his new position in Hell. And by "new position" I mean being roasted on a spit while simultaneously being screwed for eternity by the barbed Horn of Horror of Ogolan the Vengeance Demon.

A fitting "end" (pun intended) some will say, and reason enough to forever and ever put Jerry the Jowly out of her minds.

But I can't forget the time when Jerry who didn't Fall Well insulted our Lord God and Savior by claiming that Aids was His punishment for all those homos, queers, perverts, Democrats, social progressives, atheists and Jews running loose and poisoning the American Way of Life. (Which, of course, is Christian, Republican and, above all, White).

Okay, I made up some of that. Only the homos are responsible for Aids. All those other traitors caused 9/11. I hope we're clear on that.

The right reverend Jerry the Jehosaphat's logic was plain:

1. Homosexuals are bad.

2. In fact, they're evil.

3. They can't reproduce (DUH!) so the only way to increase their numbers is by recruiting your children' (yes, I mean YOU, Abigail Morton, 1864 Smellen St., Des Moines, Iowa)

4. God really hates this.

And thus we have Aids. It's God's way of killing off the queers. Way to go, God!

But children also get Aids. Some are born with it. Some get it from being raped. Being gay doesn't have anything to do with it. In fact, most newborns (and I'm just guessing here) have no idea that they're going to have to pick a "side" eventually. So maybe God is sorting out the one's he already knows are going to turn homo. After all, God is pretty darn smart.

Or, pretty damn stupid, and can't tell the difference between an innocent child and a guilty as hell flaming queer boy. Which is it?

My hope is that Jerry the Cow Bell will some day take Sarkwon the Sulphuric's horned penis out of his mouth long enough to answer that question. But, I'm not holding my breath.